My Life On StandbySo Standby and Watch This Fall Away And Fall Apart
About this Entry
Posted by: mylifeonstandby

Visit mylifeonstandby's Xanga Site

Original: 8/16/2005 12:04 AM
Views: 2
Comments: 0
eProps: 0

Read Comments
Post a Comment
Back to Your Xanga Site



Tuesday, August 16, 2005

 
Currently Listening
Chapter V
By Staind
Take This
see related
Do You Believe The Way You Choose To Be...

What's up? Not a lot been going on here except the usual, work, school and seeing Taylor as much as I can. I had him all weekend which was cool. His mother moved him down by wilmington she moved in with some guy she met on the internet. I hate it, I just want to be the best father I can for Taylor and I cant with him all the way down there. There's just not enough hours in the day, it's an hour and 1/2 from here, right now it's hard enough for work and school to see him what I do. It just makes it 10 times worse. I work and go to school for him, everything I do is for him. I want him to have the best life possible and I know the only way I can do that for him is to finish school and get a decent job. I dont want to be one of those dad's who work all the time either, I want my time with him. I want to be able to go to all of his ball games when he gets older, and just be there for him. It's not his fault that any of this happened, and I just dont want him to suffer on either end. I dont want him to lose contact with his mom either or anything he needs us both equally, the same. I just dont think the whole thing is fair to him or I and our relationship. She's always done what's in her best interest though so I guess I shouldnt be too suprised. I cant begin to explain all the hurt I feel about the whole thing. I tried to be fair, it's not a matter of controlling what she does. Do I agree with her moving in with some guy she met from the internet an hour and 1/2 from all of her family? No, but that's her choice she'll figure it out, but that's my son. I want my time with him, he deserves to have both of us there, regardless of our differences. There's no benifit from this for Taylor at all. He gets to lose my mom watching him and shoved in a daycare.  I just want to be there for my son,be his dad, and I still will. This just makes it 10x more difficult. It makes it harder to see him, I get less time because i'll spend 3 damn hours of my time driving with him. It just breaks my fucking heart. I'll always find a way to be there for him though, I love him more than anything and there's not a thing in this world that could stop me from being the best father I can for him.

If You Take Away These Memories All That's Left Is Me...
 Posted 8/16/2005 12:04 AM - 2 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments

Give eProps or Post a Comment

Choose Identity
(?)
 
Give eProps (?)
Post a Comment
Add Link | Preview HTML comment help 
  • Say it with Minis! (?)

Profile Pic:
Default  |  Choose »  (?)



Back to mylifeonstandby's Xanga Site!
Note: your comment will appear in mylifeonstandby's local time zone:
GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)