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Do You Believe The Way You Choose To Be...
What's up? Not a lot been going on here except the usual, work, school
and seeing Taylor as much as I can. I had him all weekend which was
cool. His mother moved him down by wilmington she moved in with some
guy she met on the internet. I hate it, I just want to be the best
father I can for Taylor and I cant with him all the way down there.
There's just not enough hours in the day, it's an hour and 1/2 from
here, right now it's hard enough for work and school to see him what I
do. It just makes it 10 times worse. I work and go to school for him,
everything I do is for him. I want him to have the best life possible
and I know the only way I can do that for him is to finish school and
get a decent job. I dont want to be one of those dad's who work all the
time either, I want my time with him. I want to be able to go to all of
his ball games when he gets older, and just be there for him. It's not
his fault that any of this happened, and I just dont want him to suffer
on either end. I dont want him to lose contact with his mom either or
anything he needs us both equally, the same. I just dont think the
whole thing is fair to him or I and our relationship. She's always done
what's in her best interest though so I guess I shouldnt be too
suprised. I cant begin to explain all the hurt I feel about the whole
thing. I tried to be fair, it's not a matter of controlling what she
does. Do I agree with her moving in with some guy she met from the
internet an hour and 1/2 from all of her family? No, but that's her
choice she'll figure it out, but that's my son. I want my time with
him, he deserves to have both of us there, regardless of our
differences. There's no benifit from this for Taylor at all. He gets to
lose my mom watching him and shoved in a daycare. I just want to
be there for my son,be his dad, and I still will. This just makes it
10x more difficult. It makes it harder to see him, I get less time
because i'll spend 3 damn hours of my time driving with him. It just
breaks my fucking heart. I'll always find a way to be there for him
though, I love him more than anything and there's not a thing in this
world that could stop me from being the best father I can for him.
If You Take Away These Memories All That's Left Is Me... |
| | Posted 8/16/2005 12:04 AM - 2 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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